Bachelorette

by Leah L. Cole

I saw one of my friends today
It's been at least two months since I've seen him.
We sat down to catch up
His wedding is two months away.
He even showed me his tux.
He got a vacant look in his eye;
Snapped back;
Looked at me and said,

Well, the closest you've ever come to this was that guy

My smile froze.
Was I really that close?
     I expected the proposal
     Not the cheating with my best friend
     I don't think I would have said yes
     But maybe that's retroactive decision making
My brain itches
Like a feather stroke on an old, hard scar.
I don't want this.
I'm not ready to give me up for an us.
Why, then, can this friend
Make me feel less fortunate
Like the way old rich women look at me
When I shop in the goodwill store?

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